My Dad
Hmm... im sorry that i so long never blog... u noe.. i tried blogging like 2 or three times.. but things juz suddenly pop out haha.. like once, was juz about to blog.. den jere called say lets go out.. den all went out.. haha.. and stone arnd as usual.. yea.... haiz.. sry this post not bout tok kok..its sort of for me to do some reflections.
Ok see.. my brother and i.. had some argument and stuff... well.. thats not the real important stuff.. but yea.. cause of argument.. we got called in by dad... to get lectured...
my dad doesnt hit us or nething.. nor does he scold.. when he lectures... he really lectures and reasons... and this time... it really made me realise how great my dad is.. how right he is and how much i have to learn from him.. and how i have been taking things for granted....
Many of us take our parents for granted.. what they do to us and stuff... and sometimes we are even rude to them and argue and stuff... my brother was arguing a lot with my mother and it was a heated arguement... that was when my father told us about respect...
we the new generation.. often lack respect for our parents and elders... "would you shout at your superiors? be rude at them, 大呼小叫? no, but yet you DARE to do that to your parents... who do u think you are? you lack respect...
i am not using my athority as your father to oppress you. here i am listening to your own reasonings, yet you cant listen to mine without breaking up my sentences and raising your voice? like MM lee said... there must be a certain limit one can go. and you have to respect me. No matter what, you have to respect your elders, it is basic. even if mum hits you or scolds you, there is a reason, you have to right to retaliate so fiercely and say such hurtful and subjective comments about your mother.
My father, your grand father. use to hit us too when we were young.. and its way worse than you can think of. we have all experienced this before.. its part of the process of growing up.. but never have we ever been so rude to our parents and NEVER EVER do we hold any grudges (my bro has some grudges wif my mum, and is like constantly at war wif my mum.. for dunno how long.. over thoes 芝麻小事 i will talk abt them l8er) and express such hatreat as u do... even though how harsh my father was to us since young, no matter how strict, we have lived with him, taken care of him, until he passed away.. and why? because i respect him. i respect my father deeply. that is what you all lack. respect."
that part really moved me to tears..
Learn to forgive and forget, not learn to hate.. live and let live.. were his main words...
"you often only remember the bad things, the punishment that mum has set upon you. you hold on to these bad memories so tightly that it forms to such hatreat... yet you cannot be bothered to even remember any of the good things that your mum and i have done to you. how can you, keep regurgitating these small little things and express hatreat to your parents over these... have you ever see the bigger picture? the care, the concern, the love that we put in, can far outweigh anything a hundread times over. 我们有没有亏待过你吗？yet have you ever shown a tinge of appreciation? and instead, you hold these heavy grudges of us "ill treating" you when you were young, punishing you, and then regurgitating thoes memories as rebelious actions. i have laid my hands of for very long. and i seldom hit you in the past. but i want you to think now. when have i hit you and what were they for. (bro cant think of nething) let me tell you. 3 things. 1. STEALING MONEY. 2.being dishonost 3.bullying others can you remember them? do i hit you for no reason? now you are in the army.. you have your own allowance... but i still give you allowance every now and then.. why? have you ever thought of why? because i know you spend money like using water. and i give you these extra cash so that you would not one day, run out of money, and start manifesting thoes greedy thoughts and back to your old ways of stealing money... think a bout it"
this part i really couldnt stop tearing.. cause i realised how great my father was..... my bro juz takes the money say thx and doesnt really do much.. juz like spend it and stuff... never have i or he thought that this was actually my fathers way of helping him contol himself.
"男子汉， 心胸不要这么狭窄... Learn to forgive and forget, not learn to hate. why make a mountain out of a molehill? why hold any grudges? all the more, at your own family? why must you have the concept of an eye for an eye? an eye for an eye makes the world go blind. yes sure.. i used to be like you when i was younger.. in the army.. thoes coprals and seargants... 征我征到要死. 我也是整天都想：“他妈的。。总有一天，我升值之后，一定找你们算账。把你们征死. but after time, after being promoted. i realised that they are no longer a threat and now they even have to look at me with different eyes and call me sir... its over. i have already gone beyond their level. i have excelled ahead and why stoop to their level? instead of hating them.. now i even pity them... remember.. never never hold grudges, they make you one sided and make u unable to make the right judgement....
"look at me.. i am the chairman of so many associations (singapore pawn brokers association, maris stella school alumni, the singapore Ho clan .. etc) .. it is not because i am more capable than any of the other members. but it is because i do not over look anyones' ideas. i do not boot lick and i do not look down on people... 一视同仁... that is the most important... 你要走的路还很远。“
anyway... thoes were juz excerpts of what my dad said to us... mostly to my bro anyways... but yea.. hour long lecture... was really insightful and stuff. i think my dad is really very 伟大. how much he sacrificed for the family... i really have so much to learn.... oh and btw.. all was spoken in chinese.. so its like yar... sounds better, and closer to heart.
so yea... i noe many of u take ur parents for granted too.. but please look at how much they have done for u.. they do not wish anything more than juz appreciation. your arguing aint helping..
peace
/\/egima Fr34K* toked kok @ 5/16/2006 11:59:00 pm
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